last night is as follows:

i go to sleep at 12.

i get woken up at 1:30 by a phone call.

caller id: unknown
me: hello?
guy: hi.
uh, hello?
uh, hi.
hello? (i'm really sleepy, if you can't tell.)
hi, can i speak to kelly?
sorry dude, you got the wrong number.
oh, alright.
no problem. and i go back to sleep.

i get woken up at 2:00.

caller id: unknown

me: hello?
same guy: hi.
::yawn:: hello?
can i speak to kelly?
dude, this is the same guy you talked to last time. there's no kelly, i don't know of one.
oh. sorry.

i get woken up at 2:30.

me: hello?
same guy: can i speak to kelly?
dude, are you drunk or something? there's no kelly at this number. i don't even KNOW a kelly.
oh. sorry.

i get woken up at 3:00.

me: hello?
same guy: is kelly there?
DUDE. THERE'S NO FUCKING KELLY HERE. MAYBE SHE GAVE YOU THE WRONG NUMBER BECAUSE SHE DIDN'T WANT YOUR PSYCHO ASS TO CALL AT FUCKING 3 O'CLOCK IN THE MORNING. IF YOU CALL AGAIN, I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL TRACK YOU DOWN AND RIP YOUR FUCKING THROAT OUT AND WRITE KELLY ALL OVER IT. SOME PEOPLE IN THIS WORLD ARE TRYING TO FUCKING SLEEP. BUY YOURSELF A FUCKING CLUE, ASSHAT!
oh. sorry.
NO, YOU'RE FUCKING NOT! YOU CALLED GOD KNOWS HOW MANY TIMES TO FIND A GIRL THAT DOESN'T EXIST. WHAT ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID OR SOMETHING?! LET ME FUCKING SLEEP YOU BITCHASS MOTHERFUCKER, GO CALL YOUR MOM OR SOMETHING.
i'll let you go back to sleep then.
BITCH.
::click::

according to my parents, they didn't hear a THING last night.

and i was yelling on the phone.

man, what a night. i didn't even drink.