/begin rant.

watching my apartmentmate make a strawberry smoothie is like watching a gimp guy run a mile, but that's not a very good analogy.
allow me to explain:
so i heard a voice in the kitchen, asking me if i could make a strawberry smoothies out of my strawberries.
"sure."
first he cleans out the blender by sticking dish soap into the blender, proceeding to comment how dirty the blender was.
secretly, i just felt frustrated with him just because he's probably the one in the apartment LEAST concerned with how clean things were, pans, dishes, whatever.
he then takes out like 8 frozen strawberries and sticks them in the blender and proceeds to beat them to pieces without any liquid.
ok, fine...that works....in culinary school. for chopping meat or veggies. he then proceeds to continually hit the pulse button until the strawberries are all in little tiny chunks.
then he adds like a tablespoon of milk and turns the blender on. it barely does anything.
"why, is it not going all smoothie like?"
"uh. you need liquid mark. to get it to go."
he adds more milk, turns it on, and it doesn't do anything.
"why is it STILL not going?!"
"uh. more liquid."
so this keeps going and repeating until he's added nearly a quart of milk.

...

and the strawberries are still sticking to the side of the blender.
"this is a LOT more than i thought it would be."
"mark, you're methodology is all wrong. you beat the strawberries, and get them to stick to the side of the blender, and then you add milk to try to get it all smoothie like? it doesn't work like that."
"well...you can suck it. where is the sugar?"
he grabs the sugar from the cupboard, and puts in like a cup of sugar.
i kind of gawk at the amount of sugar he just dumped in. i could visibly see the smoothie go UP volumetrically.
he then goes and beats the sugar in. i retreat back to my room, muttering something to justin about watching mark making a smoothie being agonizingly painful.
mark comes in, and he's drinking his smoothie, and he's like..."wow...there's so much here."

i'm just sitting here with a satisfied smirk knowing that he's lactose intolerant and he's got nearly a quart of milk in there.

i don't hate him, but the way he does things just aren't efficient, nor are they smart. but the thing is, he's intelligent, and sometimes brilliant. but simple things like this just make me seriously doubt his existence.


/end rant