basically andrew (bleached hair andrew) has told me several things, and i have decided to stay here at blogger...

one for the utility...and two for the privacy...

i don't know how much privacy i'm getting, but it doesn't seem like anyone's reading this...but having had a conversation with andrew, i'm feeling more at ease about the lack of visitors.

i'm still talking to andrew now...but he's made think about many things...how i value the friends i have and the people i confide in...

there was a situation today that called upon the people i needed most today....

i called gary up after the situation simmered a bit, and he walked right over to my house, even though it was getting really dark. he didn't even ask any questions, he just came right over. i love him for that.

during my walk with gary, i kept imagining the phone call i would give rachel about the situation. i kept imagining her doling out sympathy to me and the like...but when i actually talked to her on aim ( a poor excuse for a communication line ), she didn't do as i thought, but kept the situation grounded and down to earth. she cut the crap and told me what i needed to know, what i needed to hear, and most importantly, what i didn't need to hear. i love her for that.

and finally for tonight, andrew...the bleached hair andrew....some of the things he says are so simple, and yet it clicks so loudly in my mind...some things he says just make so much more sense, and not only does it clear the fog of confusion, but it also brings in the light...i've always valued him as a friend because of his helpfulness, his resourcefulness and his ...andrewness but that love and valued friendship hasn't appeared clearer than it has today...

it just seems like after talking to andrew, everything has become crystal.

i like this feeling.

it feels good.